A Brief Drama about Testosterone and Armpits

I am a fairly frequent visitor to sports-oriented Web sites. In some cases I think this is because the writers are more interesting than the sports they write about. While actually watching an NBA game would be insufferable, reading an entertaining account of the silly things players and coaches do is still quite fun.

Not surprisingly, the advertisers that bring me my sports commentary are skewed pretty strongly toward a male audience. Today I have been assaulted with orange and gold banners promoting Axiron®, the only underarm testosterone treatment (emphasis theirs).

At last this all-too-common exchange is a thing of the past:

DOCTOR: Well, Dave, looks like you’re low on testosterone.
DAVE: Oh, no! Whatever shall I do?*
DOCTOR: No problem, Dave, I’ll prescribe some pills.
DAVE: But doctor, have you forgotten my… special problem? That I can only take medication through my armpits?
DOCTOR: Curses! If only there were some way to administer testosterone through the armpits! Think of the lives that would be saved!

* This is how men talk when they need testosterone.

Well, now that happy day has arrived and those poor afflicted souls who must absorb their chemicals through their armpits can get their heapin’ helping of man-hormones to start the day.

Thank you, science, and thank you Axiron®!

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3 thoughts on “A Brief Drama about Testosterone and Armpits

  1. please let me know when penicillin and aspirin can be applied pit-ally, that would really save me some heart- and mouthache.

    bonus points if i end up smelling like a fresh spring’s day!

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