You Wrote a Bad Song

There’s a pop song in the heavy rotation over here, called “Bad Day”. I suspect it is popular over on the other side of the pond as well. It is an inoffensive little tune, a bit on the catchy side, and were it not played so often I would have never even noticed it. There’s nothing wrong with catchy little tunes; that describes much of the Beatles’ output, and now they are considered one of the greatest pop bands ever.

So while I don’t hate the song, I woke up with it in my head this morning and soon thereafter some alternate lyrics blossomed in my caffeinated cranium:

You Wrote a Bad Song
(to the tune of Bad Day)

You wrote up a pop song and you knew it was crap,
A helping of saccharine and whole lot of sap,
The artist within you said ‘no way’,
Throw that piece of crap away,
But that’s not how how you earn your paaaaaay…

You wrote a bad song,
You pushed it too far,
But now it’s on the charts
and it’s made you a star

You wrote a bad song
You made some new friends
but now they want to know
when you’ll do it again

Because you’ve known it all along,
You wrote a bad song.

You sit at your keyboard and play with some notes,
But all of the lyrics stick in your throat
Everything that you write that blows
Will be played on the radio,
But that’s now how you want to be knoooooooooown…

You wrote a bad song
You pushed it too far,
But now it’s on the charts
And it’s made you a star.

A million people CAN be wrong,
You wrote a bad song.

Sometimes when you’re thinking late at night,
You wonder what went wrong,
You remember how happy your were the time
The radio first played your song
They played your song…

So where is dispassion when you need it the most?
Why can’t the artist just give up the ghost?
You know if you do it all your way
Play what you really want to play
All your brain-dead fans will saaaaaaaaay…

You wrote a bad song
You pushed it to far
We came to hear candy
And you’re giving us art

Yeah, You wrote a bad song
You pushed it too far
But now it’s on the charts
And it’s made you a star

You wrote a bad song…
You wrote a bad song…
You wrote a bad song…
[Repeat many, many times, fade out]

26 thoughts on “You Wrote a Bad Song

  1. Bravo, I have no idea what song you wre talking about in the first place…But I think your song has potencial…Are you signed yet or do you still need a manager?

  2. It is amazing how establishment Bob and I are, considering that we were both barefoot and unemployed in Berkeley in the 60’s.

  3. I finally heard the “Bad Song” song last night on the car radio (for the record, it was KPRI and the DJ identified it as “new music”). Of course I didn’t recognize it as The Song until the second time through the chorus.
    Brad and Doug were in the car with me (they must have been, to pry they tuner off of my NPR), so I asked them if they were familiar with the song. They were, and were very dismissive of it, noting “Girls like it a lot.”
    On first hearing, I would say typical piano-to-the-forefront, emasculated production (“give me more saccharine strings on the chorus!”), and lite lyrics that…well, girls like. But essentially inoffesive when compared to bombast like the current Sheryl Crowe duet “Always by your side.”

  4. I am flattered that, after all this time, you still remembered my reinterpretation (some might say improvement) of the song well enough to connect it up with the noise coming out of your radio.

  5. was gonna sms this thought to you, then realized it could be haiku’d:

    “It’s all for me grog…”
    Damn you catchy sea shanty
    Three days in my head!

  6. Yer right jer, I beat ya. I got a 43. That, considering I went to school in Santa Cruz while the Dead still played, must mean I was a pretty republican hippy.

  7. Like a pesky STD, a zit before the prom, or MrC5K3 posting to a previously unblemished comment thread, the song is popping up most unwelcomingly across the San Diego radio dial. After a mere 4 listenings, I share your deep animosity towards this shallowest of pop songs, but I don’t know whether I reached this judgment honestly or was predisposed to this conclusion by your persuasive writings.

  8. While acknowledging that Keith is our resident expert on pesky STDs, I wanted to explain to the newcomers/egg friars that when he describes a thread as “previously unblemished” you should read that as “consisting entirely of Keith’s self praise”.

  9. I think that the song would be less annoying were it less catchy. And less nasal. And less whiny. I’m getting quite a few Google these days hits by people looking for the words or the music.

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