Are We Not Men? We Are Google!

Some people visit this site on purpose. Go figure. There are more who arrive her by accident, the collision of words sought with words used somewhere in these pages, which now number in the hundreds. Every once in a while I take time out from my busy and productive life to see just what it is that people are looking for, when they wind up here instead. Here is a list of some of the ones that have caught my eye lately. As always, when I don’t want the phrase to distract search engines in the future, I obfuscate key words with spaces.

  • daniel  p o w t e r  bad day noteshere is my parody
  • d o k u r o – c h a n  lyrics – (multiple searches) amazingly, I had exactly what the searcher was looking for. I’m getting multiple hits for this episode daily now; while it doesn’t rival egg frying, it’s big, baby.
  • pipiru piru piru pipiru pi – as above, lyrics and a brief review are here
  • john bevinshe was a good guy
  • mystery family revival band in san angelo – linked to the Homeless Tour category page, where I hope the searcher found my mention of the band in a salaciously titled episode. If the act goes big, I’ll be able to say I saw their first gig.
  • internet access pirate 4×4 – top link, thanks to a fortunate convergence of the stars, but what were they really looking for?
  • baby ocelot – once a classic, now rare. Linked to a page like this one, which referred to a previous google page, which referred to yet another page, before the chain finally reached the “elevator ocelot rutabaga” episode.
  • pirate toast All For Me Grog – linked to the Pirates! category page, where there is much talk of grog, and of the old song.
  • he, too, once lived in Arkady – probably searching for references for one of my favorite paintings in the Louvre, instead came to the Observations category page.
  • lyrics to skippy snackbar jingle – the searcher came to the Bars of the World Tour category page, attracted to an episode about the Herna Snack Bar and to one where I refer to a crazy woman’s friend as Skippy.
  • zoo phonics groveland – came to an old Homeless Tour episode, written the day I wandered the streets of Groveland looking for some toast.
  • MYSTERIOUS SECRET MESSAGEhere
  • hotelsmobile – search came from Malta. linked
  • “eunuch sex” – linked to another google episode
  • what the color of a rose means – as I am a widely respected expert on romance and the ways of a woman’s heart, it’s only natural people would turn here for advice
  • what are the three major forces of life in china? – second only to my legendary romantic prowess is my astonishing knowledge of life in China. Linked to the Politics category, which hasn’t seen much action lately.
  • you cant spell pirate without irate – linked to the Pirates! category page
  • elf breasts – linked to one of my trashier chapter ones.
  • ned’s +albuquerque – I get hits for several bars, and now Ned’s has joined the bunch.
  • “amazon women in the avocado jungle of death” – a surprsingly fun movie (not that it would take much to be surprised), the episode reached is actually one of the first entries from the homeless tour
  • “spreadable meat” – linked to an episode about hockey.
  • scary bloody gorey picture – linked to an episode about books
  • Strč prst skrz krk – It’s the whole no-vowels thing
  • cartoon swearing symbols – linked to the Homeless tour category page
  • “i’ve never told this to anyone else before” – linked to an episode that, while muddled, I happen to like.
  • what makes a bar and grill work – while I have some thoughts about that, Canyon Bar and Grill is probably not the place to emulate – but it has personality.
  • girls american fotbol team – sign me up as cheerleader!
  • “fried chicken embryos” – perpetuating the misnomer in the name of culinary arts
  • celebtrity heart attack victims – a misspelling get me the top match
  • flyer for socks for the homeless – linked to the Homeless Tour category page, naturally, where I discuss socks, flyers, and things like that.
  • czech word nazis pronounce – in general, Czechs aren’t big fans of Nazis.
  • death in Gila Bend – all I saw was a slice of life.
  • TOASTY TENTS – not only connected to a Get-Poor-Quick scheme here, but there was a store called halfbakery selling a product for keeping you toasty in your tent.
  • does jer’s prof want to meet tomorrow at noon – somewhere on the Web the answer must lie! Linked to the Stories category page.
  • joe byrne these things I know – Linked to a page where I discuss Joe’s last gig at Callahan’s before heading out into the big world, in which I barely mention the band.

Egg Fryers have shown a surge in popularity again lately (I suspect that episodes like this one actually make Google think that my blog is more important, because there are so many links to it.), as well as violent anime searchers, and the steady flow of people wanting to read about particular bars. I’m trying to come up with a system so the comments get indexed by Google as well.