19 thoughts on “Something I’ve done that you haven’t”
Not many years ago, while bowling, I knocked my friend’s mom down when I let go of the ball at the wrong point of my swing. She was standing behind me.
You also once bowled from a wheelchair. This was before they had the ramps that people in wheelchairs can aim and then gently start the bowling ball rolling. No, you had to actually throw the ball while you were seated in the chair. The momentum transfer as the ball was released almost tipped you over, so we had to hold the the wheelchair down every time.
God Damn it Jerry!
I’m sitting here checking out the muddledworld with the Pedro’s on the TV background up on the zonies 5-3 bottom 8th, and the next thing I know it’s Diamondbacks 8 – 5. It’s the curse of Jer! I’m checking out til the end of the game.
Once, while on the Putt Putt Tour, I lined up for the 18th hole. It was an easy straight shot to a volcano like hole. I gave the ball a good whack, to be sure it had the momentum to get up the steep sides leading up to the hole. Well, my aim was a bit off, and the ball jumped off the volcano, bounced out of the 18th, rolled across the cement, bounced into the 16th, and in the hole. It was a hole in one, just not on the 18th. Bastards I was with wouldn’t count it.
Going to Petco tonight. Had hoped that the Padres would win yesterday and the Giants would lose, thus putting the magic number at 2 going into tonight’s game with the Giants and allowing us, perhaps, to witness a division clinching victoray. Alas, neither team cooperated and we will have to satisfy ourselves tonight with booing Barry Bonds.
Something like,
Pedros/Padres, Zonies = Arizonans.
Zonie souvenir = San Diego sweatshirt, ’cause the zonies have little tolerance for cold and are surprised at how cool the coast can be, even in summer sometimes.
Last night’s Pad (lew-pronounce it “pod”) defeat was my fault. I brought on the curse of Jer. I had done well all night concentrating on the game, enjoying the stellar performance by Peavy as he worked around leadoff walks and one out doubles… Then, with two out in the ninth and one on, on a long fly ball, I let it slip: “can’t wait to tell Jerry” I thought. Ball dropped. Giants go on to win.
They have a chance to make history as well… no team has ever made it to the playoffs with a losing record. This accomplishment would be something the whole division can be proud of.
I agree it would be historic. Of course, we were rooting for them to clinch it. Now, I join you in hoping that they go either 0 for 4 or 1 for 3 to finish under .500.
FYI, the Mariners set a record of dubious distinction: the Mariners became the first team since the 1915-16 Philadelphia Athletics to lose 90 or more games for two years after winning 90 or more for two years.
I guess we were like in eleventh grade or something. White Rock Still had a bowling alley. We kids drank some Foster Oil Cans in the Methodist parking lot and went to the Bowling Alley. It was December 24th, and you can ask around, folks’ll verify this. A foot or two of snow around on the ground, I went to hurl another perfect strike but instead slipped, wound up on my ass with the ball rolling down the lane at like 1 mile a week, straight out of the movies. It took like 3 minutes to work its way down the lane, and whatdo you know, knocked em all down. I popped back on my feet turn around full cheer, who’se the man? But no one is cheering, they are all ashen, staring at the ground, what’s up, squish, step on a lizard. Lizard, guts all hanging out scurries into the ball return right as my ball comes ramping back out.
Then there was that time in Green River with my man Kiersun, hey nico you like to bowl? Sure, but I ain’t particularly good at it, followed by a 288. Kiersun almost made me walk home. That and it was during the Cosmic Bowl session. Actually it wasn’t cosmic bowling night, but those guys caved in to our request and set it up right. Nothing says cosmic bowling quite like a blacklight and contemporary Country music on the jukebox.
Not many years ago, while bowling, I knocked my friend’s mom down when I let go of the ball at the wrong point of my swing. She was standing behind me.
Jer,
You also once bowled from a wheelchair. This was before they had the ramps that people in wheelchairs can aim and then gently start the bowling ball rolling. No, you had to actually throw the ball while you were seated in the chair. The momentum transfer as the ball was released almost tipped you over, so we had to hold the the wheelchair down every time.
Holy crap lew!!!
Ladies and Gentlemen,
We have a winnar!!!11eleventyone!11one1!!!
God Damn it Jerry!
I’m sitting here checking out the muddledworld with the Pedro’s on the TV background up on the zonies 5-3 bottom 8th, and the next thing I know it’s Diamondbacks 8 – 5. It’s the curse of Jer! I’m checking out til the end of the game.
The Padres motto: success by sucking less than the others.
Once, while on the Putt Putt Tour, I lined up for the 18th hole. It was an easy straight shot to a volcano like hole. I gave the ball a good whack, to be sure it had the momentum to get up the steep sides leading up to the hole. Well, my aim was a bit off, and the ball jumped off the volcano, bounced out of the 18th, rolled across the cement, bounced into the 16th, and in the hole. It was a hole in one, just not on the 18th. Bastards I was with wouldn’t count it.
That john up there is me. I was using a borrowed computer
Going to Petco tonight. Had hoped that the Padres would win yesterday and the Giants would lose, thus putting the magic number at 2 going into tonight’s game with the Giants and allowing us, perhaps, to witness a division clinching victoray. Alas, neither team cooperated and we will have to satisfy ourselves tonight with booing Barry Bonds.
I am not sure that I understand Brian’s comment up there. Can anyone help me out?
It was a long time ago, in a blog post far, far away. Jer made the comment that the further away he was from the San Diego teams, the better they did.
Apparently, now that the season is getting into crunch time, Prague isn’t far enough.
Something like,
Pedros/Padres, Zonies = Arizonans.
Zonie souvenir = San Diego sweatshirt, ’cause the zonies have little tolerance for cold and are surprised at how cool the coast can be, even in summer sometimes.
Last night’s Pad (lew-pronounce it “pod”) defeat was my fault. I brought on the curse of Jer. I had done well all night concentrating on the game, enjoying the stellar performance by Peavy as he worked around leadoff walks and one out doubles… Then, with two out in the ninth and one on, on a long fly ball, I let it slip: “can’t wait to tell Jerry” I thought. Ball dropped. Giants go on to win.
Pads Win! Pads Win!
They have a chance to make history as well… no team has ever made it to the playoffs with a losing record. This accomplishment would be something the whole division can be proud of.
I agree it would be historic. Of course, we were rooting for them to clinch it. Now, I join you in hoping that they go either 0 for 4 or 1 for 3 to finish under .500.
FYI, the Mariners set a record of dubious distinction: the Mariners became the first team since the 1915-16 Philadelphia Athletics to lose 90 or more games for two years after winning 90 or more for two years.
That should be 1 and 3 rather than 1 for 3. If they do go 1 for 3, then I will be rooting for them to lose the last game.
I guess we were like in eleventh grade or something. White Rock Still had a bowling alley. We kids drank some Foster Oil Cans in the Methodist parking lot and went to the Bowling Alley. It was December 24th, and you can ask around, folks’ll verify this. A foot or two of snow around on the ground, I went to hurl another perfect strike but instead slipped, wound up on my ass with the ball rolling down the lane at like 1 mile a week, straight out of the movies. It took like 3 minutes to work its way down the lane, and whatdo you know, knocked em all down. I popped back on my feet turn around full cheer, who’se the man? But no one is cheering, they are all ashen, staring at the ground, what’s up, squish, step on a lizard. Lizard, guts all hanging out scurries into the ball return right as my ball comes ramping back out.
Then there was that time in Green River with my man Kiersun, hey nico you like to bowl? Sure, but I ain’t particularly good at it, followed by a 288. Kiersun almost made me walk home. That and it was during the Cosmic Bowl session. Actually it wasn’t cosmic bowling night, but those guys caved in to our request and set it up right. Nothing says cosmic bowling quite like a blacklight and contemporary Country music on the jukebox.
Them’s some mighty fine bowling stories, nico.
80 & 79. Now we need a three game losing streak in order for them to end the season (and, more importantly, enter the playoffs) below .500.
Alas! 81 & 79. History will have to wait at least another year.