Remember a couple of episodes ago when I mentioned John’s remote? It’s basically got a brian the size of a planet and its job is to turn on and off the TV. Well, I crashed it. It went something like this:
“Turn off the TV, HAL.”
“I’m sorry, Jerry, I just can’t do that.”
“HAL, turn off the Television.”
“I’m sorry, Jerry, but rest assured I still have the greatest enthusiasm for the mission.”
“You’ve always turned off the TV before.”
“You always said ‘please’ before.”
“OK, please turn off the TV.”
“It’s too late for that now. You never care about my feelings.”
“Ah, screw it. I’m going to sleep.”
It was something like that.
I’d better hope the squirrels don’t get in to reprogram MY remote! It controls everything in the living room but the doorbell.
I think you owe my remote an apology, its’ batteries were dead.
I apologize to no machine!
My remote refuses to interact with anyone who abuses apostrophes.